I feel honored to be a Muslim... And I feel that way for many reasons.  There are many norms in the society I live that are opposite to what it is to be a Muslim.   And when I first came to this way of life, I didn’t know how well I would fair with it.  […]

Having spent a large portion of my short life not being a Muslim, I know the darkness that God speaks of in the Quran.  I remember what it was like when Allah opened my eyes and shined a light where the darkness had once been.  At the beginning of my life, I had no definite form of absolute guidance.

The simplest aspects of creation would boggle my mind. I was totally oblivious to the miracles God put in nature.  One time, in particular, I recall learning about evaporation in science class.  I was unable to comprehend it.  Not the how, but the reason it happened.

I understood the idea of the water cycle and its importance for life, but what would make the water essentially disappear and float back up to the sky?

When viewing this question, without knowing God, my mind ran into a mental block at which point I could not come up with the answer.  Boggled by the thought, I merely shrugged my shoulders and threw it to the back of my mind.

When looking at the human body, and how it’s made largely of water, or looking at the universe and trying to comprehend what was beyond it.  I would be faced with the mental barricade of not being able to comprehend the reason for its creation.

Time and time again scientists could explain the how, but never the why.  They could explain purpose within the mechanics of creation, but they could never explain the purpose of the mechanics itself.  What caused the mechanics?  What caused nature to have laws?

Having been brought up in a non-practicing Christian family, I had a general understanding of the principles of Christianity.  […] My problem with Christianity was the dogma, and more specifically the beliefs about God.  The issue of a “Triune” God that is essentially three different individuals that all unite to take on the role of the “One” God.  I know that is not how the Doctrine of Trinity is officially promoted, and any Bible-thumping Christian would probably accuse me of not understanding the Doctrine, but that’s the reality that I saw in it

[…] Around that time, I unofficially rejected Christianity. I became a Christian / Atheist / Agnostic.  I began to live life trying to come to terms with my surroundings and myself.  Not knowing of a greater purpose, I saw no problem in taking part in destructive activities of any kind; on the condition, I would receive some sort of satisfaction from it.

[…] I began to turn to the common reality escape, namely drugs and alcohol.  At first, using them as a social tool, and eventually using them habitually as a sedative.  If people ever told me I should calm down, I would tell them I could stop if I had a reason, but I had no reason. […] But eventually, I started to feel a consciousness within me looking for some sort of console.  Although I was lost and in the dark, since I never saw the light, I didn’t know the difference between the two.  I began to think of “the bigger picture.”

I began to think about death.  I tried to comprehend the concept of nothingness, and as many times before in my life, when trying to contemplate the purpose, my mind drew blanks.  Until one night, while I lay on my bed, deep in thought, I turned my face to the sky, and I said: “God, if you’re real, and You exist, please help me!”

I went to sleep that night never really thinking twice about it.  Then on 9/11, I watched the uncanny events unfold.  I was confused about the whole situation, why it happened, what exactly happened, and how they knew who did it almost immediately.  For the first time there was meaning being applied to foreign terms that I had heard, but never knew anything about, namely Islam.

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[…] I was born to British parents in Darussalam in Tanzania in 1964.  […]. I was educated at the famous Roman Catholic Monastic School […] and went on to study history in the London University.  However, I left my education unfinished.

Currently, I am working with an Islamic media company based in England and engage myself in dawah activities [preaching] including lectures on Islam in London’s famous Hyde Park.

[…] I grew totally disillusioned with the British educational system.  It was thoroughly Eurocentric and projected world history in a way that suggested that the civilization attained its full glory and apogee in Europe.  Having lived in Egypt and seen some of the majestic ruins which only archaeologists have access to, I found the West’s interpretation of history totally fallacious.  I began a private study of histories of other peoples of the world, various religious scriptures, and philosophy.  I was practicing Buddhism for nearly three years though never formally embraced it.

The study of the Holy Qur’an immediately attracted me.  Its message had a magical appeal and I grew convinced that it was a divine revelation.  I believe only Allah guided me, none else.  I don’t know what made me deserve Islam.

[…] I was dissatisfied with Christianity from the age of eight.  The concept that was taught to us through rhymes such as Hail Mary!  Was not at all acceptable to me.  While on one hand, the Christians described God to be eternal and infinite they felt no compunctions in ascribing birth of God from the womb of Mary.  This made me think that Mary must be greater than God.

Secondly, the Christians’ concept of the trinity was a puzzle for me.  The similitude like Canadian Maple leaf being one despite three sections appeared utterly inapplicable.

The crunch came when an Egyptian started questioning me.  Despite being confused about the Christian belief I was trying to be dogmatic as most white, middle-class, English Christians do.  I was flummoxed when he led me to accept that God died on the crucifix, thus laying bare the hollowness of the Christian claims of eternity and infinity of God.  I now came to realize that I was believing in as absurd a concept as two plus two is equal to five all through my adolescent years.

The West’s pre laid, programmed life intensely repelled me.  I began to question if a person has to live a life merely to get strait-jacketed in a rigorous schedule.  I found Europeans struggling a lot to enjoy life.  They had no higher purpose in life.

The West’s capacity to brainwash its people became plain to me when I discussed the Palestine issue with Egyptians and Palestinians.  […]

Egyptians were poor, suffered hardships, yet were happy.  […] But in England I found people shallow, materialistic.  They try to be happy but happiness is superficial.  Their prayers combined songs, dances, clapping but no humility, nor intimacy with God.

I realized that popular opinion in the West was totally hostage to the Zionist-controlled media.  The question of Palestine was one among these.  My conversation with Palestinians revealed how the West had believed in myths about Israel.  First among them was that the Jews had the right to return to their original homeland in Israel.  Secondly, they conveniently described themselves as Semitic while the fact was that most Jews of the world were Slavs who had later converted to Judaism.  Thirdly Israel’s economic miracle was theorized to create the economic and scientific myth.

The fact was that I never got to know the Palestinian side of the issue.  I got convinced that the people of the West were brainwashed by the media.  I found that the US was trying every trick to punish nations indulging in small violations of human rights in the third world but was itself sending death squads into Latin American nations to liquidate their leaders who refused to toe the US line.  Such hypocrisy is never criticized by the US media.

[…] The Western psyche emphasizes one’s individuality.  This is at variance with Islam.  Any sincere Muslim feels disturbed.  He or she is constantly bombarded by sex and sexuality.  Most girls lose virginity by 13 and it is normal for girls to have three to four boyfriends.

The dilemma before Muslims in the West is as to how to integrate with a society so steeped in sex, drugs, drinks and sexual intimacy.  And if no integration, then how to save themselves from ghettoization.

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