Those who are not Muslim and committed to religion may think that Muslim women cover themselves in front of men. They do not wear make-up. They do not have boyfriends. They do not take part in mixed parties with men where they can dress up and flirt, and dance with music. What is the sort of life that they have? How do they enjoy life?
Also, non-Muslim women may look at the eastern type of Muslim women’s lifestyle and say: do they not get bored of staying home and raising children and taking care of their husband all the time? Do they not want some time for themselves?
This way of thinking makes some of them so worried about Muslim women that they start campaigns for defending Muslim women and try to awaken them for their very normal rights!
On the other hand, many Muslim women and I, when looking at the lifestyle of non-Muslim women, think to ourselves that they do not cover themselves in the presence of their marriageable kin (non-Mahram) men.
They dance with any man! They spend a lot of time dressing up and wearing make-up to go to nightclubs or parties to present themselves to men! So that one man may say: “you look so beautiful!”, and they say: “Thanks, I’m flattered!”
They go to the same swimming pools that men go, nearly nude! Forget about Islamic cover, where does modesty go?! They taste different boys in life before they get married, or let’s say they allow different boys to taste them! What is that sort of life? Do they not get offended by being degraded so much?
Muslim women may look at non-Muslim women’s western type of lifestyle and say: do they not get bored when they do not have big family gatherings, where all children and grandchildren come together around their grandparents? Do they not miss big parties in which instead of drinking and going out of mind, people sit together and talk about their issues and find out if one of the group has a problem, then everyone tries to sort it out?!
Now as a Muslim woman with the background of growing up in a huge eastern family, and then experiencing the Western lifestyle for many years, let me tell you what Muslim women do for fun. What they enjoy in life and why they stick to the eastern lifestyle without getting bored.
In my definition, the eastern Islamic lifestyle does not belong to the East only; rather it has remained in the East while it has disappeared in the West. You may find many people in the East who live a western lifestyle. You may as well find people in the West who live an eastern lifestyle.
I would like to list a few characteristics that are bold in an eastern Islamic lifestyle:
The high amount of respect that people have towards each other, especially the respect for the elderly or the teachers.
The importance of family.
The priority of the community over the individual.
Definition of freedom; In their social life, People are free as far as their freedom does not disturb others, while in western lifestyle people are free to do what they wish to do as long as it is not against the social rules; no matter if it may bother other individuals.
Ethics and human values are stronger than law.
The above points and many other similar points come together and shape a viewpoint about humans and life. And it is due to that point of view that eastern or western lifestyle develops.
As long as we do not become familiar with other people’s ideologies, we will not recognize the difference of opinions about the same issues.
When Muslim women, all over the world, have a tendency towards the eastern lifestyle, that has been completed by the Islamic teachings, in many cases, they will no more enjoy the same things that non-Muslims like. No matter in which part of the world you live as a Muslim, but when you are a Muslim, your mindset is shaped in a way that you enjoy the Islamic lifestyle.
With the sort of ideology that Muslim women have, they no more enjoy exhibiting their bodies for their marriageable kins (non-Mahram). They do not enjoy flirting with different guys all the time or going to nightclubs. While at the same time many of them may enjoy having lots of children and being in big families, in which they come together now and then, in order to empower themselves with the energy of the community.
The Islamic lifestyle gives us a vision and a spiritual goal (unlike most of the western goals which are materialistic). A Muslim woman (like a Muslim man) defines her activities in harmony with her beliefs, to help her achieve her spiritual goal in life. Therefore, she defines her fun activities in a way that does not contradict her path of growth.
Finally, keeping in mind all the above, there is no difference between Muslim men and Muslim women in terms of having fun. It might be a matter of modesty in relationships, which is recommended not only for women but also for men. Suggestions about different types of lawful (Halal) fun is available in an article with the title “What is lawful (Halal) fun?”.
Overall, Muslim women can have all sorts of fun that do not contradict the Islamic values and do not deviate them from their central roles such as motherhood as well. (Please note that by motherhood Islam does not mean only giving birth to the baby and feeding her/him. But the most important social role of a mother is to nurture the child to grow up into a great human).
The word "Hijab"—which literally means screening or, better said, protecting something from the view of others—refers, in the Islamic context, to a kind of attire or a piece of clothing that covers a woman's body and hair.
Not long before the advent of Islam were women regarded as objects of men's lust; female children were buried alive. To be brief, women were subject to physical exploitation and degradation. Islam, however, elevated women's status in society and granted them equitable treatment.
This idea is underscored many times in the Quran: “And whoever does righteous deeds, whether male or female, should he be faithful such shall enter paradise and they will not be wronged] so much as [the speck on a date-stone” (4: 124); or, “Whoever commits a misdeed shall not be requited except with its like, but whoever acts righteously, whether male or female, should he be faithful such shall enter paradise, provided therein without any reckoning” (40: 40). There are copious other examples in this regard.
The fact that Hijab (in Islam) is not exclusively for women is equally important and worthy of attention; men also should be heedful of their clothing and their behavior. As a matter of fact, the Holy Quran first speaks of the word 'Hijab' about men and then women: “[Prophet], Tell the faithful men to cast down their looks and to guard their private parts. That is more decent for them. Allah is indeed well aware of what they do. And tell the faithful women to cast down their looks and to guard their private parts, and not to display their charms, except for what is outward, and let them draw their scarfs over their bosoms, and not display their charms except to their husbands, or their fathers, or their husband's fathers, or their sons, or their husband's sons, or their brothers, or their brothers" sons, or their sisters" sons, or their women, or their slave girls, or male dependants lacking [sexual] desire, or children uninitiated to women's parts. And let them not thump their feet to make known their hidden ornaments. Rally to Allah in repentance, O faithful, so that you may be felicitous” (24: 30-31).
One out of the many benefits of the Hijab is to preserve and secure the stability of marriage, but how? Dressing modestly reduces extramarital sexual tensions between men and women.
Hijab, in essence, obliterates the ill thoughts of sick minds. In social interactions also Hijab does urges men and women to focus on the personality of each other, to build their relationship upon respect, virtue, and decency. In this way, they protect and propagate chastity and morality in society.
There are many great examples of chaste and pious women in the history of Islam who have tremendously contributed to the advancement of Islam and humanity in general.
As a key Islamic value, Hijab is consistent with human nature. Men and women are by nature in favor of maintaining their dignity and self-esteem, and Hijab paves this way; it gives them an inner strength and empowers them to tell the world their decency and virtue cannot be compromised. The result is inner peace.
Therefore, from the teachings of the Quran, we come to realize that Hijab is the best principle (or code of conduct, if you will) that guarantees a better condition for male-female interactions in society because it keeps rampant desires on a tight leash. On a larger scale, observation of the Hijab prevents the society from falling into corruption and degeneracy.
We also realized that Hijab is not merely limited to the physical covering of the head and body; in fact, the physical Hijab must be accompanied by the Hijab of the heart and the mind.
Amidst the hustle and bustle of everyday life—with its common pitfalls and concealed traps—Hijab is truly a liberation beyond measure; it frees us from the slavish imitation of pseudo-liberal fashions that appear by day and vanish by night. It is a shield that protects our honor and helps us focus more and more on our superior goals.
I am a Muslim woman. I grew up in an Islamic country. I went to segregated schools, sports clubs, swimming pools, friendly parties, and wedding parties. Then I chose Media as my career. I worked in different journals, made films, and traveled to various cities and countries, with or without my family.
As a Muslim who believes in modesty and follows the rules of Islam, my Islamic country is an outstanding place. However, I did not realize that, until I had to leave my country. I lived in Europe for several years. I had heard that the west is where the dreams of freedom come true. But after a short while, I found myself imprisoned in Europe.
I am a table tennis trainer, a good swimmer, a good basketballer, and relatively professional in many sports. In my Islamic country, I used to go to women’s sports clubs or women’s swimming pools after school since childhood. But years ago in Europe, I could not find any sports clubs that were segregated from men, so I could wear my comfortable sports set and play my favorite sports. Because there were men everywhere, and I wanted to keep my modesty, besides my Hijab.
Then a few Muslims came together and decided to rent a sports club for a few hours over the weekend. It sounded awesome, but when we went to that sports club that we had hired for women only, I realized that European Muslims who were born and raised in European countries were mostly very weak in sports.
Basically because since childhood they did not have access to segregated sports clubs to learn and practice any sports. And of course, my problem was that I could not find anyone to play professionally with and enjoy playing! Therefore for as long as I lived in Europe I felt imprisoned.
And when I returned to my Islamic country, I was so thankful that I had sports clubs (where we have our athletic competitions), gyms, swimming pools, spas, and even women-only parks! where we could enjoy running without a scarf or taking a sunbath, and not worry that we are doing anything against God’s will or orders.
Talking too much about my memories of a Muslim woman was all for the goal to discuss a few misconceptions about being a Muslim woman and deprived of social rights.
Well! What should I say? This article is being written by an educated practicing Muslim woman who is now educating other Muslim and non-Muslim women.
We have narrations from our beloved prophet (PBUH&HP) that encourage us to learn until death; “Gain knowledge traveling” [1] or “Gain knowledge even if it is in China.” [2], which emphasizes the importance of gaining knowledge during one’s lifetime, even if one has to travel far distances and learn the knowledge from non-Muslims.
Also in another narration, our prophet (PBUH&HP) makes it an obligation to learn, and not only an obligatory for men, but he emphasizes that it is also a lifetime and necessary for women to be knowledgeable; “Gaining knowledge is an obligation upon all Muslim men and women” [3].
We also read in the history that the prophet’s (PBUH&HP) daughter and granddaughters were excellent teachers and used to teach women of their era.
The only issue that is raised about women’s education is being in mixed classes and groups with male students. In such situations, it is not women’s education that is forbidden (Haram), but like any other situation of mixed gatherings (men and women), people should be wary of their relationships.
Women should avoid flirting and chatting about different issues with men if it is not necessary. The relationship between students of the opposite sex is lawful (Halal) as long as there is no intention for pleasure. [4]
"Dalia Mogahed was the US’ first Muslim woman in the White House back in 2009 and one of Barack Obama’s ‘closest advisors’"
In Islam some duties that are obligatory for men, such as defending the borders of their country if it is attacked, or working outside the house to earn money for a living. But making it compulsory for men, never means that it is forbidden for women.
“Islam views women as masters of the family and emphasizes that the family environment must become a safe, dignified and tranquil one for women so that they could do their best in fulfilling their main task which is to care for the family .” That is the reason for which there is no force on women to work and bring money for the family. [5].
And that, in fact, is the most important social activity in itself. However, if a woman would like to participate in different social and political activities, besides her role as a wife or a mother, there are no objections towards it. Muslim women have no essential duties in their homes such as cooking or cleaning or sewing, etc. unless they wish to do it themselves. Otherwise, the husband could hire a servant to do the house works.
Nevertheless, the fact that women are less active in political activities comes down to their feminine nature. Imam Ali (AS) says: “woman is like a fragrant flower, and not a champion” [6], which means she should not be expected to do tasks that are beyond her capabilities. But it does not mean that she cannot choose to do things that may naturally be against her nature.
Also, some women may not choose to do manly tasks. However, at some point, they have no choice but to do so. For example, it is narrated that at the time of Imam Ali (AS), Lady Fatima (AS) went to the mosque and performed speeches. Or after the event of Ashura, Lady Zainab (AS) took on her shoulders the responsibility that was even hard for a few strong men and performed political speeches in different places.
There are plenty of issues that are forbidden in Islamic countries, either for men or women, which are not related to the Islamic law but go back to the old cultures and traditions of those nations. For example, wearing a veil for Muslim women, or preventing women from education, etc. are all amongst those old cultures.
However, many of them have been mixed up with the Islamic law, and people regard them as religious matters instead of social conventions. But we have to be clever enough, to distinguish between the Islamic law and old traditions of different nations. The same way that Muslims do not relate mistakes of “so-called” Christians to the religion of Christianity.
Driving is forbidden for women in very few countries, and there is no firm Islamic ruling to support it.
In fact driving in today’s world, makes traveling safer for women and there is no rational opinion against it.
There are many narrations from our Prophet (PBUH) that encourage people to do sports that are common in their time such as swimming, horse riding, and archery, and in those narrations, women were never excluded. In fact, no reference shows sports to be forbidden (Haram) for Muslim women. But in this case, again it is the issue of modesty and Hijab that should be observed.
Regarding sports that are forbidden (Haram), there is no difference between men and women. Sports that are connected to gambling or may harm the player are forbidden (Haram) for both men and women.
There is no problem for women having fun if they do not commit a sinful act; and again, there is no difference in this between men and women. The only point for women is that they should consider keeping their hijab and modesty (Haya) and do not join activities that may harm their chastity. You can read about forbidden (Haram) and lawful (Halal) fun in Islam in related articles.
Reference:
- Wasa’el al-Shi’a, vol. 27, p. 27
- Dailami, Irshad al-Quloub ila- al-sawa, vol. 1, p. 165
- Amali Al-Sadouq, p. 419.
- muslim women
- women in islam
- Ghurar al-Hikam & Durar al-Kalem, p. 759