Mothers in Islam are held in very high esteem. How a Muslim should treat their parents, especially the mother, is underlined in the holy Quran and Hadiths [i]. Several verses in the Quran emphasize the difficulties that a mother goes through and the respect that should be accorded to her.

“We have enjoined man to be kind to his parents. His mother has carried him in travail and bore him in travail, and his gestation and weaning take thirty months. When he comes of age and reaches forty years, he says," My Lord! Inspire me to give thanks for Your blessing with which You have blessed me and my parents, and that I may do righteous deeds which may please You, and invest my descendants with righteousness. Indeed I have turned to you in penitence, and I am one of the Muslims” (46:15).

This verse mentions both parents in general but goes into detail in regards to the mothers in Islam because she faces challenges that a father does not. The command to treat parents with kindness means to shower love, affection, and piety on them, both in words and deeds.

One should treat them with respect under all circumstances, obey them unless it is something that God has forbidden, care for them in old age as they cared for you as a child, give priority to their orders over voluntary acts of worship.

And approach them with tender humility and mercy; not to raise your voice above theirs, nor to fix your glance on them, nor to call them by their names; to be patient with them, and never harm them verbally or physically.

But why should we be kind to our parents, especially our mothers? The Quran repeats the struggles a mother withstands in another passage to highlight the need for one to reciprocate their parents’ sacrifice for them:

 “We have enjoined man concerning his parents: His mother carried him through weakness upon weakness, and his weaning takes two years. Give thanks to Me and your parents. To Me is the return. But if they urge you to ascribe to Me as a partner that of which you have no knowledge, then do not obey them. Keep their company honorably in this world and follow the way of him who turns to Me penitently. Then to Me will be your return, whereat I will inform you concerning what you used to do” (31:14, 15).

There are also verses in the Quran that the mention of servitude to God is immediately followed by the command of being kind to parents. This is also repeated throughout the Quran:

“Worship Allah and do not ascribe any partners to Him, and be good to parents…” (4:36).

“Your Lord has decreed that you shall not worship anyone except Him, and [He has enjoined] kindness to parents. Should they reach old age at your side one of them or both do not say to them," Fie!" And do not chide them, but speak to them noble words. Lower the wing of humility to them, out of mercy, and say," My Lord!” (17:23-24)

 Prophet Muhammad's (PBUH&HP) Views about the Status of Mothers in Islam

These verses indicate that after worshiping Allah alone, beautiful conduct to parents is the next most important duty for a Muslim. Mothers in Islam are due to this conduct even before fathers according to the command of Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) in the story below:

A man came to the Prophet and said, ‘O Messenger of God! Who among the people is the most worthy of my good companionship? The Prophet (PBUH&HP) said: ‘Your mother.’ The man said, ‘Then who?’ The Prophet said: ‘Then your mother.’ The man further asked, ‘Then who?’ The Prophet repeated: ‘Then your mother.’ The man asked again, ‘Then who?’ The Prophet said: ‘Then your father’ [1].

The importance of the mother over the father is highlighted in this Hadith [i] by repeating “your mother” three times and then saying “your father” once in response to the man’s question.

All these Quranic verses and sayings (Hadiths) demonstrate the extraordinary worth of mothers in Islam. This religion considers the attainment of the last phase of perfection, namely paradise, dependent on the mother’s satisfaction, as Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) said: “Heaven lies beneath the feet of mothers [2]”.

Notes:
[i]. sayings of the Holy Prophet (PBUH) and Imams

References:

1. Bihar al-Anwar, v.74, p 49
2. Mizan al-Hikmah, v.10, pp.712-713
3. mother in Islam
4. mother

“Allah made for you mates from your own selves and appointed for you children and grandchildren from your mates, and We provided you with all the good things. What, do they believe in falsehood while they deny the blessing of Allah?” (16:72)

If you are married, you might have experienced how a successful marriage plays an important part in our lives. Marriage in Islam is the cornerstone of the family and the only relationship that effectively prepares us for the community; so, if it is thought upon carefully and wisely, it will result in the well-being of the society as well as each individual.

Unlike some religious denominations that encourage celibacy as a means of salvation and great virtue, there is no monasticism in Islam [1]. Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) says in this regard: “Marriage is my way (Sunnah), Whoever turns away from it is not ‘among my followers’” [2].

With regard to marriage in Islam, he has also stated: “There is no better structure founded in Islam other than marriage” [3].

The Purpose of Marriage in Islam

According to a narration from Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP), marriage in Islam is considered as half of a Muslim’s religion:

“One who marries has already fulfilled half of his religion, therefore he should fear Allah for the other half” [4].

What do you think the reason is? What are the important benefits to which marriage is linked?

Looking into it from different aspects, one might find various reasons for getting married, like money, popularity, religion, beauty, etc. But the religion of Islam focuses on the more spiritual aspect of this holy covenant, i.e., peace, security, and affection:

“And of His signs (God’s signs) is that He created for you mates from your own selves that you may take comfort in them, and He ordained affection and mercy between you. There are indeed signs in that for a people who reflect” (30:21).

The other aspects that make marriage in Islam a necessity in humans’ life are as follows:

Emotional Needs:

As mentioned in the verse of Quran above, marriage in Islam, in the most suitable way, is the source of emotional comfort to us. Quran also says:

“It is He (God) who created you from a single soul, and made from it its mate, that he might find comfort with her” (7:189).

When you get married, the first thing you promise your spouse is to care for her/him, to meet his/her emotional needs. That is what makes you fall in love with your life companion and lets the two of you experience love, affection, mutual understanding, peace of mind, and happiness.

Regarding this matter, Imam Sadiq (AS) has said:

“Whenever a man’s love for his wife increases, his faith increases in quality” [5].

Physical Needs (sexual desire):

Humans naturally possess a sexual instinct which is a significant and strong desire. Everyone feels the urge to have a partner for fulfilling their sexual needs in a safe and serene environment, which will help them grow and reach high levels of perfection and satisfaction.

Abstaining from marriage often results in physical and mental disorders. Doctors from Georgia State University in a study published in 2001 found that those who choose to be celibate are frequently afflicted with feelings of anger, frustration, self-doubt and even depression [6].

The religion of Islam not only recognizes the sexual needs of human but also strongly recommends marriage as the only legal way of fulfilling this desire.

The Social Needs:

Human beings are social creatures, who like all other beings, have urges which lead to starting a family of their own and reproduction. In this regard, Quran says:

“The originator of the heavens and the earth, He made for you mates from your own selves, and mates of the cattle, by which means He multiplies you…” (42:11).

Based on this verse, Children are the results of marriage in Islam that make the procreation of humankind continue. They also play an important role in stabilizing the family foundations. Islam gives a great deal of emphasis to both marriage and bringing up faithful and virtuous children since they are considered as building blocks of a healthy society.

Apart from that, marriage shields the whole society as well as every single individual from lots of evil deeds. It has been narrated from Prophet Muhammad that, when a person gets married at a young age, Satan will become angry since she/he has guarded two-third of his/her religion against him [7]. Married people are less involved in socially destructive acts like any extramarital affairs.

Self-purification

From the Islamic perspective, marriage is not merely a means of legalizing sexual relations. In fact, it unites the existence of the man and woman as a couple, brings them together and makes them complementary to each other.

The peaceful and secure environment that the husband and wife live in is the best place to practice self-control, selflessness, and self-purification. Pious couples always invite one another to goodness. They are also a source of encouragement in preventing each other from committing sins and performing the obligatory acts of worship, which eventually makes them have a respectable and honest life forever.

It has been narrated that once the Prophet (PBUH&HP) went to Imam Ali (AS)’s and Lady Fatimah (AS)’s house after their wedding. He asked Imam Ali (AS) how he found his spouse. Imam replied: “I found Zahra (AS) as the best help in worshipping the Almighty Allah.” The Prophet (PBUH&HP) then asked Fatimah al-Zahra (AS) the same question, and she replied: “He is the best husband” [7].

We learn from this narration that one of the main purposes of marriage is actually what Imam Ali (AS) has mentioned, i.e., serving Allah. When a man and a woman get married, the two become one. The bond between them mirrors the unconditional love between The Creator and us, and this is the ultimate experience a true believer always seeks to have.

References:

1. Al-Qadi al-Nu'man, Daim al-Islam, v. 2, p. 193, h. 701
2. Bihar al-Anwar, v. 103, p 220.
3. Wasa 'il al Shiah, vol 14, p 3.
4. Wasa’il ul-Shi’a, Vol. 14, p 5.
5. Wasa’il, vol 20. p 24, H 24931.
6. Navader (Ravandi), p 12.
7. Bihar al-Anwar, vol 43, p 117.