“Your Lord has decreed that you shall not worship anyone except Him, and He has enjoined kindness to parents. Should they reach old age at your side one of them or both do not say to them," Fie!" And do not chide them, but speak to them noble words” (17:23). Sitting on the porch of her house, with a deep frown on her face, she seemed absorbed by some unending thoughts. She did not know where she was, neither the boy who was so kindly and attentively taking care of her like a kind nurse, nor the deep unknown feeling that steered within her when he helped her. The only thing she remembered, was that her beloved husband had died and she was left alone.

It had been so many years since the mirror in her room reflected the view of a white-haired, withered, old woman sitting in a wheelchair. But still, she wanted to solve the mystery of the boy’s identity. “Someone must have hired him to take care of me,” she thought. “But who? I’m sure I have no one.”

Instantly, the door of the house opened, and the mysterious young nurse appeared, wearing a big and cheerful smile and a warm, loving look on his face [i][ii] [1]. He had brought her pills. As usual, he put the pills one by one and patiently in her mouth and gave her water to swallow them.

Then kissed her on the forehead and hugged her tightly. She remembered the days when she did not feel good. When she shouted and cursed him violently. She also remembered his patient face at those moments, when he was trying so hard to hold back his tears, taking her hands and kissing them. “What kind of a nurse is he?” she wondered. Respect was an inseparable part of his behavior toward her, always observing not to raise his voice, not to walk ahead of her, and not to act in a way that would make her feel ashamed and humiliated [iii] [2].

She did not remember if she had ever asked him who he was. So, she gathered her courage to ask and went inside. Entering the house, she saw a man sitting on the couch, arguing on an apparently serious matter with her nurse. “Let’s not bother them,” she thought and turned her wheelchair toward her room, but suddenly something caught her attention.

The man was shouting so she could not help hearing his words: “she does not remember you, not even your name and you are wasting your time here nursing her? What about your job? You are a successful manager for GOD’s sake!” The old woman turned to the boy to see his face. For the first time, she saw the look of rage in him: “She doesn’t, but I do. She is my mother, and I will take care of her to my last breath. “For the record, I became what you say I am, because of her.”

He suddenly felt the weight of the old woman’s look on him. Tears fell on her cheeks irresistibly. After all, the mystery had been solved: her kind and a generous nurse was her loving son, her one and only child.

The next day, when she woke up, the first thing she wanted to see was the face of her nurse, his smile, his kind look. She did not know his name or that why he was there, but she felt sure that her patient, loving and a nice nurse would never ever leave her alone.

Notes:

[i]. The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him and his family) said: “Every righteous child who casts a look of mercy and affection upon his parents shall be granted, for every look of his, Rewards equivalent to that of an accepted Hajj.”

[ii]. The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him and his family) has said: “The look of a child towards his parents out of love for them is an act of worship.”

[iii]. Imam as-Sadiq (peace be upon him) has said (in regards to one’s parents): “Do not cast your gaze upon them except with love and compassion; do not raise your voice above theirs; do not raise your hands above theirs; do not walk ahead of them.”

References:

1. 'Allama Majlisi, Bihar al-Anvar, V. 74, p. 73
2. ibid, V. 74, P. 79

Many incidents happen in societies which make so many children orphans, Incidents such as earthquakes, floods, tsunamis, or smaller events. Thus, the issue of taking care of these orphan kids becomes a challenge that should be dealt with. Many of these children may be sent to orphanages by the government.

And they keep waiting for some family to adopt them and take care of them. But, there are many parents who cannot give birth to a child and they wish to adopt one and make their family bigger. Some parents may have children of their own, and they want to adopt a child to help and take care of him/her.

This text explains the rulings of adopting a child according to the Islamic law.

The Difference Between Adoptive Children and Biological Children

 There are four major differences in Islamic law between adoptive and biological children:

1- Adopted children are better to be named after their biological parents. If they are named after their adoptive parents, the foster parents should not precisely introduce them as their own child. (This is forbidden (Haram) since it is a lie.)

2- Adopted children do not automatically inherit from their adoptive parents. Unless it is mentioned in the parents’ will.

3- When adopted children become mature (Baligh) they will become of the marriageable kin (non-Mahram) to their adoptive family (parents, brothers/ sisters, uncles/ aunts).

4- The property of an adopted child (provided by his/her biological parents or family members) belongs to him/ her. Adoptive parents will keep it as mere trustees.

The Importance of Supporting Orphans in Islam

Islam has careful considerations towards orphans. Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) himself had adopted a child and was fed by an adoptive mother during the first two years of his life.

It is narrated by Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) that “‘ The one who sponsors an orphan and I are like these two in Paradise.’ Then he joined his index and middle fingers” [1].

Orphans are so important in the eyes of God that Allah says in the Holy Quran “Indeed those who consume the property of orphans wrongfully, only ingest fire into their bellies, and soon they will enter the Blaze.” (4: 10)

There are specific rules in Islam with regards to adopting children.

In Islam, biological parents and the family lineage are of great significance. So, child adoption must not occur in a way that children lose their filiation. It is essential to keep in mind that according to Islam, filiation will be inherited from biological parents. Thus, by making a child adoption contract, the adoptive family will not be the child’s filiation.

Adopting Children or Child Protection

According to Islamic law, child adoption is forbidden (Haram). But child protection (Kifalah) is highly recommended. By child adoption we mean, accepting a child and considering him/her as the adoptive parents’ real child. By child protection, we suggest that the child is being taken care of by his/ her foster parents. And at a suitable age, he/ she will be informed of his/her real filiation.

Thus, there is no problem in accepting a child as his/ her protector (Kafil). It becomes problematic when adopted children are not told the truth about their biological parents. It is understandable that it would be hard to tell any child that he/ she is not a family’s real child. But, consultations can help parents to find a proper way of telling the truth to their adopted child.

Besides, it is highly recommended in Islam to protect and support orphans, which means giving them financial and spiritual support in all aspects of their lives.

Why Islam Recommends Child Protection (Kafalah) instead of Adopting Children

There are many arguments about child adoption in Islam. Some people complain about the adoption rules. They believe that infants who have the chance of being adopted should be named after their adoptive parents. So they do not feel orphaned in society.

 One of the points that Islam has in this regard is that the adopted children are of unmarriageable kin (non-Mahram). So when they grow up, they may face problems within their adoptive family.

 Also if the adopted child is not aware of his/her real identity, there would be a chance of him marrying a marriageable kin (Mahram) of his/her biological family line without being aware of that. In Islam, like every other Abrahamic religion, it is forbidden to marry a marriageable kin (Mahram) [ii].

Is There Any way that the Adopted Child Could Become of the Marriageable Kin (Mahram)?

There is a tradition in some cultures that women do not feed their own children. Instead, they choose a wet nurse to breastfeed the child. The child who is breastfed from another woman, for a specific duration, will become of marriageable kin (Mahram) to the woman and her family.

 Thus, if the adopted child is under two years old, and if the adoptive mother or her sister or her mother can breastfeed the child for a specific duration, a Foster (Ridha’) relationship will be created. As a result, the child will become of marriageable kin (Mahram) [i]. But the rulings with regards to inheritance is still the same.

Notes:

[i] For exact information about foster (Ridha’) you should refer to your own source of emulation (Marja’ taqlid)

[ii] Read more about marriageable kin (mahram) at http://salamislam.com/content/who-are-mahrams-islam/4

References:

1. Humairi, Abdullah bin Ja’far, Qurbul Isnad, p. 9, hadith 315, Aalul-Bait (a.s.) Institute, Qom, first edition, 1413 A.H.
2. Chapter Yousuf. verses 23 - 32