Throughout the history of humankind, strong women have always been a source of inspiration and growth. Women who, alongside men, brought significant changes to the world, making it a better place to live and to prosper. One of the most prominent and praised women in the history of Islam is Lady Khadija (AS), Prophet Muhammad's (PBUH&HP) wife and companion, who had a vital role in the spread of Islam. She was one of those women whose influence and exceptional characteristics still resonates throughout the ages and among many generations after her.
In what follows, we will look at the life of Lady Khadija (AS), this distinguished personality.
Known as Khadīja al-Kubrā (AS) and Umm al-Mu' minīn (the Mother of Believers), Lady Khadija (AS) was born fifteen years before Am Al-Fil [i]. Therefore, her birth date is approximately 555 A.D. Her father, a famous figure in the Quraysh tribe in Mecca, was Khuwaylid b. Asad b. Abd al-Uzza b. Qusayy [1] and her mother was Fatima bt. Za'ida [2]. According to some sources, Lady Khadija (AS) had a distant relation in lineage with Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP), and their roots went back to the same ancestors [3].
The available information concerning Lady Khadija (AS) before marrying Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) is limited and scarce. Nevertheless, she was known to be a wealthy merchant who employed others to work for her and benefited from a part of the profit [4]. Due to her ancestral nobility, she was of high social status and respected among her people. As Ibn Sayyid al-Nas said: "She was an honorable and wise lady, and God granted her with His blessing." [5]
According to some sources, before meeting Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) in person and starting a business relation with him, Lady Khadija (AS) had heard about his trustworthiness and honesty. Therefore, she asked Muhammad (PBUH&HP) to join her and help her in expanding her business [6].
Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) went at least five business trips for Lady Khadija (AS), the most important of which that led to their marriage was the business trip to Sham. Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) went back from this trip with the good news of their financial success and profit, which impressed Lady Khadija (AS) and made her decide to choose him as the head of one of the greatest caravans traveling to Sham. The result of these trips and Prophet Muhammad's (PBUH&HP) impressive actions, was Lady Khadija's (AS) fondness toward this honest man [7]. After that, she proposed marriage to Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) [8].
Despite the disputes over Lady Khadija's (AS) marriage before Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP), which claim her to be a widow, many authentic sources believe that Lady Khadija (AS) did not marry anyone before the Prophet (PBUH&HP) and it was her first marriage [9]. This is also proved by looking at the cultural and intellectual status of Lady Khadija (AS) in Hijaz, which made it improbable for her to marry anyone from lower-status tribes [10].
While receiving many proposals for marriage from the heads of Quraysh, offering her vast amounts of money and wealth, she refused all and instead fell in love with the honesty and righteousness of Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP). The news of this proposal shocked Lady Khadija's (AS) family and relatives, who couldn't believe her to be willing to marry a man with lower financial status and younger than herself [11].
The proposal and marriage ceremony of these two significant figures, who made an example of their marriage to the generations that followed them, was held two months after the business trip to Sham, which was mentioned above [12]. According to many sources, at the time of their marriage, Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) was twenty-five, and Lady Khadija (AS), forty years old [13]. After their marriage, she dedicated all her wealth to her husband and left the management of her business to him. Lady Khadija (AS) was the first wife of the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP), and during her life, he did not marry another woman.
There seems to be disagreement in the number of Lady Khadija (AS) and Prophet Muhammad's (PBUH&HP) children. The number ranges from six to eight, among which they include two sons and four daughters [14]. Some historians believe that Lady Fatima (AS) was the only daughter of the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) and Khadija (AS) and the other daughters were their adopted children [15].
After receiving the call to prophethood in the Hira cave, Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) first told Khadija (AS) and Imam Ali (AS) about his prophetic mission. She totally trusted her husband to be an honest man and believed in his great cause; therefore, she was the first woman who accepted Prophet Muhammad's (PBUH&HP) invitation to Islam and became a devout Muslim. Imam Ali (AS) and Lady Khadija (AS) were also the first ones who performed prayer (Salat) alongside Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) in the mosque [16].
As a wife, Lady Khadija (AS) always supported Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) in fulfilling his extraordinarily challenging and demanding mission of guiding people toward the path of Allah. At the times when people hurt the Prophet (PBUH&HP) with their offenses and unfair accusations, Khadija (AS) was there to soothe him, wipe his sadness away and give him hope to endure the hardships of this holy mission. She also financially supported Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) when they were suffering from unfair economic sanctions in the Shaib al-Abi Talib [17]. Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) always appreciated Lady Khadija's (AS) unbounded help and support and said: "No money was profitable for me the way the wealth of Khadija (a) was." [18]
Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) always loved and praised Lady Khadija (AS) for her great and exemplary personality. He used to consider her among the four praised women of all time, including Asiya [ii], Mary, and Lady Fatima (AS) [19]. She was not only a prominent and influential figure of her own time but also set an example for the generations that followed her. Her power in merchandise and business at one point, her courage, and insight in choosing a perfect husband by herself and her devotion to her married life at another, made her an ideal role model for the women all around the world.
As it was mentioned above, Lady Khadija (AS) was a well-known woman before her marriage to Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP). She was famous for her knowledge and sagacity, which manifested in her thriving business, whose fame reached all over the Hijaz. Despite the patriarchal society of her time, she had managed to establish herself as a powerful businesswoman who won the respect of great heads of the tribes and men who considered women inferior to themselves [20].
While having an active and productive role in society, Lady Khadija (AS) always preserved her modesty and presented a modest manner in her interactions with men. Doing so, rather than being praised for her physical beauty, she was honored and respected for her insight and chastity, which encouraged many of the powerful men of her time to ask her hand in marriage. Yet, since she was more interested in finding an honest and virtuous man to marry, rather than a merely wealthy man, she refused all her suitors. Finally, she found these features in Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) and chose him as her perfect match.
When she made a vow of marriage to the honest Muhammad (PBUH&HP), she knew that her life with this man would be different. When Prophet Muhammad's (PBUH&HP) mission began, she realized how much he was under pressure and needed her companionship and support. People didn't believe in him, didn't listen to him, and refused to be guided through the words of Allah, especially in the first years of his invitation to Islam. Yet, at home, he had someone who was always by his side, wipe his sadness away, and had faith in his call. Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) never loved any woman as Lady Khadija (AS), and never forgot about her love and sacrifices, always remembering her as a unique and precious person in his life [21].
Lady Khadija (AS), this honorable woman, passed away in the month of Ramadan ten years after Prophet Muhammad's (PBUH&HP) call to prophethood in 619 A.D. She was 65 years old at the time of her demise [22], [23]. She was buried by Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) in al-Ma'lat Cemetery, on the slopes of Mount Al-Hajun in Mecca. This sorrow was shortly followed by the demise of Abu-Talib, Prophet Muhammad's (PBUH&HP) uncle. These tragic incidents afflicted Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) with deep grief to the extent that he named that year as "the year of sorrow and pain (Am al-Huzn) [24].
Notes:
[i] Literally meaning the year of the Elephant, it is the year in which Abraha, the king of Yemen, started a huge military expedition toward Mecca to destroy Ka'ba. As he had an army with war elephants, the year turned to be known as the year of the Elephant.
[ii] Pharaoh's wife at the time of Prophet Moses (PBUH)
References:
- Ibn Athīr al-Jazarī, ʿAlī b. Muḥammad. Usd al-ghāba fī maʿrifat al-ṣaḥāba. Beirut: Dār al-Fikr, 1409 AH. Vol.6, p.87.
- Ibn ʿAbd al-Barr, Yūsuf b. Abd Allah. Al-Istīʿāb fī maʿrifat al-aṣḥāb. Edited by ʿAlī Muḥammad al-Bajāwī.
- Abu l-Faraj al-Isfahani, Maqatil al-talibiyyin, p.29.
- Ibn Kathīr al-Dimashqī, Ismāʿīl b. ʿUmar. Al-Bidāya wa l-nihāya. Beirut: Dār al-Fikr, 1407AH-1986. Vol. 2, p. 293.
- Ibn Sayyid al-Nās, Abū l-Fatḥ Muḥammad. ʿUyūn al-athar fī funūn al-maghāzī wa l-shamāʾil wa l-sayr.
- Abd al-Malik Ibn Hisham, Sirat Ibn Hisham, Edited by Mustafa Saqa. Beirut: Dar Ahya al-Tarath al-Arabi, vol.1, pp.187-188.
- ibid, vol.1, pp.199-200.
- Ibn Sayyid al-Nās, Abū l-Fatḥ Muḥammad. ʿUyūn al-athar fī funūn al-maghāzī wa l-shamāʾil wa l-sayr. Vol.1, p.63.
- Ibn Shahrāshūb, Muḥammad b. ʿAlī. Manāqib Āl Abī Ṭālib. Qom: ʿAllāma, 1379 AH. Vol. 1, p. 159.
- ʿĀmilī, Jaʿfar Murtaḍā al-. Al-Ṣaḥīḥ min sīrat al-Nabīyy l-aʿẓam. Beirut: Dār al-Hādī, 1415 Ah. Vol. 2, p. 123.
- Abd al-Malik Ibn Hisham, Sirat Ibn Hisham, vol.1, p. 189.
- Maqrizi, Ahmad Ibn Ali, Imta al-Asma, Dar al-Kutub al-Ilmiyah, 1999. Vol.1, p.17.
- Muhammad Ibn Sa'ad, Al-Tabaqat al-Kabir (The Book of the Major Classes), vol.8, p.17.
- Ziriklī, Khayr al-dīn al-. Al-Aʿlām Qāmūs trājm l-ashhar al-rijal wa l-nisāʾ min al-ʿArab wa l-mustaʿribīn wa l-mustashriqīn.
- ʿĀmilī, al-Ṣaḥīḥ min sīrat al-Nabī, vol. 2, p. 207-220.
- Ibn ʿAbd al-Barr, al-Istīʿāb, vol. 3, p. 1089.
- Shaykh Tabarsi, I'lam al-Wara bi A'lam al-Huda, vol.1, p.125.
- Majlisī, Muḥammad Bāqir al-. Biḥār al-anwār al-jāmiʿa li-durar akhbār al-aʾimmat al-aṭhār.
- Ibn Kathīr, al-Bidāya wa l-nihāya, vol. 2, p. 129.
- Abu l-Hasan 'Ali b. Muhammad Julabi, Manaqib al-Imam Ali b. Abi Talib, vol.2, p.422.
- Sayyid Ali b. Tawus al-Husayni al-Hilli, Al-Tara'if fi ma'rifat madhahib al-tawa'if, vol.1, p.291.
- Ibn ʿAbd al-Barr, al-Istīʿāb, vol. 4, p. 1817.
- Ṭabarī, Muḥammad b. Jarīr al-. Tārīkh al-Ṭabarī. Edited by Muḥammad Ibrāhim.
- Maqrizī, Imtāʿ al-asmāʾ, vol. 1, p. 45.
Islam has spread much more quickly than the other religions all over the world. The question is how this has happened? And it becomes more important when we consider the situation in which Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) emerged.
He (PBUH&HP) invited people to Islam while he did not have any wealth or position and even when his family opposed him; except his wife, Lady Khadija (AS), and his cousin, Imam Ali (AS). Several factors were involved which we will discuss in a series of articles. Here, the focus is on how pleasant characteristics of Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) helped Islam to become well known throughout the world.
In the Quran it is emphasized that the morals and attitude of Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) was one of the factors which attracted people to Islam: “had you been harsh and hard-hearted, they (people) would have surely scattered from around you” (3:159). This pleasant behavior of the Prophet (PBUH&HP) which made people inclined to him and Islam is known to be due to the God’s mercy over him (PBUH&HP) (3:159).
Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) was forgiving towards those who had bothered him or even insulted him. It is narrated that once, a Jew accused Prophet (PBUHHP) of owing him some money and insisted on paying him back immediately. Prophet (PBUH&HP) told him gently that he had made a mistake, but the man repeated his claim and suddenly assaulted the Prophet (PBUH&HP). The companions of Prophet (PBUH&HP) came to interfere, but he (PBUH&HP) said: “I know how to deal with my friend.” He (PBUH&HP) behaved very nicely such that the man acknowledged that this behavior is only expected from a prophet and he declared his belief and embraced Islam right there.
However, he (PBUH&HP) was very serious about applying Islamic regulations or others’ rights. It is narrated that a woman from Quraysh [i] had stolen something; she confessed and had to be punished. Many people, including her family, interfered to change the Prophet’s mind and to stop her punishment. Prophet (PBUH) told people that they had meddled because she was from a famous family, but there is no exception to Islamic rules.
To provide an exemplary leader for others, to train people to act alike, to valorize his companions and to convince people to follow his instructions, Prophet (PBUH) used to take advice. Of course, in the end, he (PBUH&HP) was the one who decided and made firm decisions: “consult them on the matter. And when you have decided, then rely upon Allah” (3:159).
“Invite (mankind) to the Way of your Lord with wisdom and fair preaching, and argue with them in a way that is better” (16:125). Unlike what is advertised against Islam, Prophet Muhammad (PBUHHP) never forced people or threatened them to accept Islam.
On the contrary, following the advice of the Quran, he promoted Islam with kindness, fairness, and wisdom. Instead of humiliating and discriminating non-Muslims, or being harsh and fierce, he used rational argument and discussion which also improved their rationality and thinking power [1]. This followed the fact that embracing Islam should be according to the personal perception and understanding and it cannot be based on the imitation [2].
Notes:
[i]A mercantile tribe that historically inhabited and controlled Mecca and Ka'aba.
References:
Treat people the way you like to be treated.
Hasan ibn Muhammad Deilami, Aalam al-din fi Sifat al-Moumenin, p.297.
The best of virtues is being good-tempered.
al-Shaykh al-Saduq, Al-Khisal (The Traits), p.29.
Whoever serves Allah sincerely, Allah will make all the universe serve him/her.
Warram b. Abi Firas al-Hilli, Tanbih al-khawatir wa nuzhat al-nawazir , vol.2, p.108.
The one who doesn't give thanks for his/her blessings is a worthless person.
Ibn Shu'ba al-Harrani, Tuhaf al-'uqul, p. 233.
Allah has made the month of Ramadan like a competition for His servants, to compete for His satisfaction with each other through obeying Him.
Ibn Shu'ba al-Harrani, Tuhaf al-'uqul, p.236.
Treat your neighbor kindly to be worthy of being a Muslim.
al-'Allama al-Majlisi, Bihar al-anwar, vol.78, p.112.
I advise you to think and contemplate since they enliven an insightful person's heart and are the key to wisdom.
Hasan ibn Muhammad Deilami, Aalam al-din fi Sifat al-Moumenin, p.297.
Consulting in groups leads you toward success.
Ibn Shu'ba al-Harrani, Tuhaf al-'uqul, p.233.
A true friend is always on your side, whether in hardships or comforts.
al-'Allama al-Majlisi, Bihar al-anwar, vol.78, p.114.
Patience means restraining from anger and having yourself under control.
Ibn Shu'ba al-Harrani, Tuhaf al-'uqul, p.227.
O' servants of Allah, beware that Allah had not created you in vain, nor left you on your own. Instead, He had determined the years of your lives and has distributed your sustenance among you. This way, any wise person will realize his/her worth and that he/she won't get more than what has been determined for him/her.
Ibn Shu'ba al-Harrani, Tuhaf al-'uqul, p.234.
Strive for this life as if you will live forever, and make every effort for the life that is to come as if you will die the next day.
Muhammad Reza, Ali and Muhammad Hakimi, Al-Hayat (Life), vol.4, p.62.
This world is the dwelling of pain and hardship, and whatever rests here is doomed to mortality. Allah had informed us of this world's workings to learn our lessons from it. He has warned us beforehand so that no excuse will remain at the end for us. Therefore, be pious in dealing with what is temporal (i.e., this world) and seek what is eternal (the afterlife).
Muhammad b. 'Ali b. Shahrashub, Manāqib Āl Abī Ṭālib, vol.4, p.31.
Verily, the lights of guidance in this Quran leads toward prosperity. This Quran heals hearts and souls.
al-'Allama al-Majlisi, Bihar al-anwar, vol.75, p.11.
There is a thin line between what is right and wrong; what you see with your own eyes is the right thing, and what you hear or is told about might be wrong.
Ibn Shu'ba al-Harrani, Tuhaf al-'uqul, p.229.
Being grateful for the blessings and being patient in hardships, are the virtues to which you can't find any negative side.
Ibn Shu'ba al-Harrani, Tuhaf al-'uqul, p.234.
Verily, people are slaves to this world and its wealth and make their religion a means of reaching their (worldly) purposes and do whatever it takes to build an ideal life. Therefore, when faced with a trial, few will adhere to their religions.
Qadi Nur Allah Shushtari, Ihqaq al-haqq, vol.11, p.234.
Whoever knows Allah, will fall in love with Him.
Warram b. Abi Firas al-Hilli, Tanbih al-khawatir wa nuzhat al-nawazir, vol.1, p.52.
The blessings are unappreciated as long as they are at hand, yet their worth will be appreciated as soon as they are lost.
al-'Allama al-Majlisi, Bihar al-anwar, vol.78, p.115.
Meanness is considering what you own as the reason for your honor, and what you give away as waste.
Ibn Shu'ba al-Harrani, Tuhaf al-'uqul, p.225.
Poverty is the greed that is not satisfied with anything.
Ibn Shu'ba al-Harrani, Tuhaf al-'uqul, pp.225&226.
I advise you to piety and constant pondering since thinking is the root of all virtues.
Warram b. Abi Firas al-Hilli, Tanbih al-khawatir wa nuzhat al-nawazir, vol.1, p.52.
When Allah blesses someone with the ability to supplicate to Him, He surely gives his/her prayers the chance of being granted.
al-'Allama al-Majlisi, Bihar al-anwar, vol.78, p.113.
Expressing your opinion on the subject, which is not related to you, puts an unnecessary burden on your shoulders.
Ibn Shu'ba al-Harrani, Tuhaf al-'uqul, p.226.
Being afraid of honesty and expressing the truth is a sign of abasement.
Ibn Shu'ba al-Harrani, Tuhaf al-'uqul, p.226.
There are three things that bring destruction to people; pride, greed, and envy.
al-'Allama al-Majlisi, Bihar al-anwar, vol.78, p.111.
The best chance for a benevolent person to forgive a guilty one is when there is no way out for the latter.
Hasan ibn Muhammad Deilami, Aalam al-din fi Sifat al-Moumenin, p.297.
Whoever counts the number of his/her charities, ruins his/her spirit of generosity.
al-'Allama al-Majlisi, Bihar al-anwar, vol.78, p.113.
The most insightful eyes are the ones that are fixed only on the goodness and virtues, and the most receptive ears are the ones who listen to advice and make use of them.
al-'Allama al-Majlisi, Bihar al-anwar, vol.78, p.109.
At times, silence is a better companion, even if you are a perfect speaker.
al-Shaykh al-Saduq, Ma'ani l-Akhbar, section no.401. Hadith no. 62.
The calamities are the keys to blessings and rewards.
Hasan ibn Muhammad Deilami, Aalam al-din fi Sifat al-Moumenin, p.297.
Whoever seeks to worship [Allah] sincerely, should purify him/herself for this purpose.
Ibn Shu'ba al-Harrani, Tuhaf al-'uqul, p.236.
No wealth is more precious than wisdom.
Baha' al-Din 'Ali b. 'Isa al-Irbili, Kashf al-ghumma fi ma'rifat al-a'imma, vol.2, p.198.
Treating people good-manneredly is a crucial part of wisdom.
al-'Allama al-Majlisi, Bihar al-anwar, vol.78, p.111.
Teach your knowledge to others and learn what others know; this way, you will both improve your own knowledge and learn what you didn't know about.
Baha' al-Din 'Ali b. 'Isa al-Irbili, Kashf al-ghumma fi ma'rifat al-a'imma, vol.2, p.197.
I wonder how you would think about the food for your body and don't contemplate on the food for your thought? You restrain from eating what is harmful to your body, but fill your mind and soul with what ruins them.
al-'Allama al-Majlisi, Bihar al-anwar, vol.1, p.218.
Your [real] thoughts will be revealed in your anger.
al-'Allama al-Majlisi, Bihar al-anwar, vol.78., p.113.
I guarantee that Allah will grant the prayers of the one whose only purpose is Allah's satisfaction.
al-'Allama al-Majlisi, Bihar al-anwar, vol.43. , p.351.
Whoever trusts Allah's best intention, will only desire what Allah chooses for him/her.
al-'Allama al-Majlisi, Bihar al-anwar, vol.78., p.106.
Giving alms-tax (Zakat) does not reduce your wealth.
al-'Allama al-Majlisi, Bihar al-anwar, vol.96., p.23.