Human beings by nature are social creatures, in need of companions and friends. Most of our lives depend on interactions with others, and man is therefore compelled to live in society and with other individuals. Friendship in Islam is considered one of the Divine blessings through which one overcomes loneliness and solitude.

Islam has placed tremendous importance on sociability and friendship. In the Quran [i], great emphasis has been placed on the concept of friendship because maintaining good company plays a pivotal role in shaping the life of the individual and it influences the path that will be chosen in life. Likewise, the Holy Prophet (PBUH&HP) and his Ahl al-Bayt (AS) on different occasions had clearly stated its importance, criteria for choosing a friend, characteristics of a good friend and the rights of a friend [1].

Friendship in Islam

Friends are an integral and important part of our social life as they contribute greatly to the development of one’s personality and they affect many aspects of our lives. Islam, in complete harmony with man’s nature, deals extensively both in the Quran and the narrations (Hadiths) of Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) with the issue of friendship in Islam.

In the Quran, Allah says:

“On that day, friends will be one another’s enemies, except for the Godwary.” (43:67)

The Holy Prophet (PBUH&HP) while explaining the impact of friends says:

“Man is influenced by the faith of his friends. Therefore, be careful of whom you befriend.”[2]

Similarly, the commander of the faithful; Imam Ali (AS) says:

“Try to have as many as possible true friends, for they are the supplies in joy and the shelters in misfortunes” [3]

Choosing a Friend

Islam attaches great emphasis on the choice of a friend to be selected in life. For this purpose, it is expected that one should employ his/her judgment in a manner free from emotion and try to set aside the criterion for assessing his/her real worth. “One must know his/her inadequacies and weak points, his/her ideas, feelings, dislikes and infirmities. Ultimately, one must discover the human merits and desirable qualities that he/she carries in the depth of his/her spirit so that one may benefit from his/her outstanding virtues.”[4]

Therefore, for the great good or bad influences friends can have on the characters and personality of each other, it is important for every man of reason to choose friends that are characterized by good mannerism and behavior.

Meanwhile, in accordance with the sayings of the Prophet (PBUH&HP) and his Ahl al-Bayt (AS), a Muslim must avoid certain sets of people as friends: transgressor, hypocrites, foolish, liar, sinful, stingy, and disregardful to his/her relatives. Similarly, non-Muslims should not be taken as intimate friends or allies [5].

However, there is no hindrance for a boy having a girl as a friend or vice versa, so far as the Islamic regulations (such as the Islamic Hijab, avoidance of indiscriminate touching, etc.) are observed and they avoid any sinful act.

Characteristics of a Good Friend

In Islam, the followings are some of the characteristics to be looked forward to in a friend:

Intelligence
Faith
Honesty
Uprightness and well mannerism

Rights of a Friend

Following some narrations (Hadiths) [6], friendship entails certain trusts and duties. The one who observes them is a true friend while one who breach them is unworthy of friendship in Islam. Here are some of the rights of friends:

Respecting them and their personality [7]
Rendering material supports in the time of need [8]
Advising them when they need your advice [9]
Forgiving their shortcomings [10]
Concealing their lapses and faults from others [11]
Visiting them when they are sick [12]
Participating in their funeral when they die[13]

Conclusion

Concisely, friends are integral parts of our social life, and it is important to be selective in the choice of companions and friends. The righteous ones who lead one to righteousness in this world and prosperity in the Hereafter should be considered as friends. 

In contrast, hypocrites and ill-mannered individuals who are sources of plights in this world and in the Hereafter should not be taken as friends. Similarly, Islam teaches the Muslims to observe certain matters in friendly relations. This is because immoderation in this regard may lead to deplorable consequences and bring regret and pain.

Notes:

[i] (9: 71), (25: 27-29), etc.

References:

1. Al-Amidi, Ghurar al-Hikam, P. 177; Mustadrak Wasa’il, Vol. 5, chapter 42
2. Allamah Majlisi, Bihar al-Anwar, Vol. 74, P. 192.
3. Mahdi as-Sadr, The Ahlul-Bayt; Ethical role models, P. 290.
4. Mujtaba Musavi Lari, Ethics and Spiritual growth, P. 211.
5. (3: 28); (4: 144); (5: 51); (9: 23) etc.
6. Imam Ali Zayn al-Abideen, Treatise on Rights, Right 33 (The right of the companion)
7. Ibid
8. Kulayni, Al-Kafi, Vol. 2, P. 198, Hadith No: 8.
9. Al-Amidi, Ghurar al-Hikam, P. 775
10. Ibid
11. Ibid, P. 707
12. Allamah Majlisi, Bihar al-Anwar, Vol. 16, P. 233, Hadith 35
13. Kulayni, Al-Kafi, Vol. 3, P. 173.

In year 60 AH Imam Hussain (AS) left Mecca with his followers and family destined to Kufah, the city of which the people had invited Imam Hussain (AS) to be their leader in the battle against Yazid. Imam Hussain (AS) took his family with himself including some of his sisters, his wives, daughters, sons and so on. Not only did he take his family with himself, but also some of his followers were accompanied by their family. 

Knowing that Imam Hussain (AS) was going to Kufah to wage a war against Yazid you may ask yourself why he jeopardized his family by taking them to this dangerous trip. 

Imam Hussain’s Household was in danger

When Yazid, in spite of the terms of Muaviah’s agreement with Imam Hassan (AS), took over as the King of Muslims and became a Caliph, Imam Hussain (AS) didn’t acknowledge him as a proper king for the Islamic society so Yazid ordered the ruler of Medina to make Imam Hussain (AS) accept Yazid as a King though Imam Hussain (AS) turned down and said:

Yazid is an alcoholic person and kills innocent people and commits sins in public, so a person like me wouldn’t accept a person like him as their king (1)

Yazid had ordered the ruler of Medina that if Imam Hussain (AS) had refused to do as the Caliph said, the ruler must have cut his head and send it to Yazid besides if anybody else   had done so, the ruler would have to do the same to them. (2) When Imam Hussain (AS) found out that he was in danger in Medina he moved to Mecca so that they couldn’t harm him because of sacredness of Kaaba. 

It was then Imam Hussain (AS) decided to leave Mecca when the letters from about 18000 people of Kufah reached asking him (desperately) to help them fight against the tyranny and cruelty of Yazid and be their leader. Thus he was well aware of the fact that he was also in jeopardy in Mecca so he took his family with him to Karbala.

(The letters of about 18000 people of Kufah reached to Imam Hussain (AS) asking him (desperately) to help them fighting against the tyranny and cruelty of Yazid and be the leader of them, he decided to leave Mecca. He knew that he was also in jeopardy in Mecca so he took his family with him.) Bear it in mind that if he hadn’t taken them with him; it is obvious that Yazid would have taken Imam Hussain’s household as hostages in order to make him give in and obey the Caliph.

Actually, Imam Hussain (AS) cleverly understood what they were up to and ruined their plans so that he could approach to his objectives. 

As an astute leader, Imam Hussain (AS) was well aware of what they were up to and their wickedness, and he ruined their plots so that he could pursue his objectives. 

Imam Hussain’s Household was his Messenger

 Imam Hussain’s household besides the martyrs’ in Karbala became mostly captivated by Umar ibn Sa’d’s forces and were at first taken to Kufah and not long afterwards to Damascus. If you scrutinize more carefully through history, you may find out that in case Imam Hussain’s household wasn’t there and got slaved, the message of Karbala would have been neglected forever.

To substantiate this fact it can be witnessed that Imam Sajjad (AS) and Lady Zeinab (SA) tried to brief people on what Yazid had done to them. They used every opportunity to talk to people and make speeches for them about Imam Hussain (AS) so that they would understand who really he was.

Once an old man in Damascus went to those enslaved women and told them: 

“Thank God that killed your men and destroyed you and extricated the people from you and relieved the King” 

Imam Sajjad (AS) replied: “O old man! Have you read the holy Quran?”  “Yes” he replied.

Then Imam Sajjad said: “Haven’t you read this verse that says:

 Say, ‘I do not ask you any reward for it except the love of [my] relatives.’ (42:23)" 

He said: “Yes, I have (read that)”

Imam Sajjad (AS) then said: “We are the relatives of the Prophet (PBUH & HP)”

The old man was so sorry then because of what he said. (3)

The women? Imam Hussain’s children, wives, sisters informed the people of Damascus about the lies that Mu’aviah and Yazid had told them about Islam and Imam Hussain (AS) and told them that they were cheated. 

The speeches of Imam Sajjad (AS) and Lady Zeinab (SA) in Damascus and Kufah are so famous.
 
The Slavery of those Women and Children Proved Imam Hussain’s Honesty

Imam Hussain (AS) sacrificed everything he had even his little son, for his objective which was reminding people the original message of Islam. Yazid had told people that Imam Hussain (AS) is a liar and is only after taking over the kingdom. When Imam Hussain (AS) sacrificed his life and the life of his family for his goal (the sake of Islam), people understood that kingdom wasn’t the thing which Imam Hussain (AS) tried to obtain but he wanted to make people aware of the tyranny and the cruelty of Yazid and Banu-Umayyah.

The Will of Allah

When Imam Hussain (AS) was leaving Mecca, his brother Muhammad ibn al-Hanafiah told him:“What’s the rush? Why do you want to go?”
“I dreamt about the Holy Prophet (PBUH & HP) and he told me to leave Mecca because Allah wants to see me martyred.” Imam Hussain (AS) replied.
Then Muhammad said: “We belong to Allah and we turn back to him. Then why do you take these women and children, knowing your destiny?” 
Imam Hussain (AS) said: “The Prophet (PBUH & HP) also said that Allah wants them to be enslaved as well” (4)

These words of Imam Hussain (AS) meant that saving the lost essence of Islam was the most important duty of him and that to achieve this goal there is no other way rather than fighting until death against the oppression of Yazid. In this way, people will be tested by Allah and also enlightened about the hideousness of Umayyad dynasty.   

We do not necessarily know the Reason of Every Issue

We believe that the infallible Imams are immaculate and they do not commit any sins or make mistakes. So when they do something, we do know and believe that they had enough reason to do so, even if we do not understand it. We may find some reasons by thinking about them but mostly we cannot be totally sure about the core of whatever they did and the reason why they had taken such actions.

References 

1. Maghtal al-Hussain (AS), Abd ar-Razzaq al-Mugharram, pg.129
2. Tarikh of Ya’ghubi, Ahmad ibn Ya’ghub, vol.2, pg.241
3. Al-Malhuf, Seyyed ibn Tavuss, pg.211
4.  The same, pg.128