A time comes in everyone’s life, or at least I hope it comes when they realize that they have to not only believe what they believe in, whatever it may be but get out there and proclaim it to the world.  Luckily, that time came early for me.  I am 17, and I am a convert to Islam which is the belief that I’m proclaiming.

"It Didn't Feel Right"

I was raised Catholic.  Not internally as much as externally.  I went to Catholic Sunday school, called CCD, but the Catholic view of God never played a major role in my childhood.  It was a Sunday thing.  Anyhow, I started to enjoy Mass around 7th grade.  It made me feel good to do the right thing.  I was always a rather moral person, but I never really studied the fundamentals of Catholicism.  I just knew that I felt good worshipping my creator. […]

Before I was confirmed in 8th grade, in the fall of 1999, I learned a lot about what Catholicism was.  The Catholicism of the Church had a lot on viewing Jesus as God in it.  Nothing like my “undivided God being worshipped by me with Jesus as an example” train of thought.  It was like they just opened up a can of cold, illogical confusion and tried to feed it to me.  It didn’t feel right. 

I continued with the Catholic Church and kept on worshipping.  But I talked to many in the church about my feelings that Jesus wasn’t God but more of a Prophet, an example.  They told me that I had to accept him as God and as a sacrifice, and so on.  I just wasn’t buying it.  I tried to buy it, but I guess God withhold the sale for my own benefit.  There was a better car out there for me.  I continued at the church. 

"I Started Reading about Islam"

Sometime in mid-December of 1999, for no reason that I can recall I started reading up on Islam in encyclopedias.  I remember making a list of bolded words in the entry for “Islam” in an old 1964 Grolier World Book that I found in my closet, and studying them.  

For some reason I was amazed by this faith and that it was all about God and that it was everything that I believed all my life - right here.  Previously, I had accepted that there was no faith like I felt inside of me.  But I was amazed that I had found this faith.  I found out that “my” faith had a name and millions of other adherents!

Without ever reading a Qur’an or talking to another Muslim, I said shahada (declaring your belief in no god but God) […].  As the months passed, I learned more.  I went through many periods of confusion, happiness, doubt, and amazement.  Islam took me on an enlightening tour of me, everyone else, and God. 

A Slow Process of Conversion to Islam

The transition was slow.  I was still attending Mass five months into my change of faith.  Each time I went, I felt more and more distant from the congregation, but closer and closer to God and the Prophet Jesus, peace be upon him. 

During Ramadan […], the second time I fasted (the first year, I converted during Ramadan and did not fast), I went to the library during lunch period.  It was better than sitting at a table with my friends because I got work done in the library.  I swear my grades went up.  Anyways, I started talking to the only other Muslim at my school, John.  We talked about Islam a little more each day.  He’s an awesome brother, and he took me to the mosque on the last Friday of Ramadan.  

Going was one of the best things I ever made in my life.  God really answered my prayers this time.  I thought I would be nervous, but I wasn’t at all.  It was the most natural thing I ever did in my life.  I felt at home.  I realized something before leaving.  As I sat there on the floor, praying to God, I realized that the room was full of others, but it was OK.  

See, at home when someone asks me what I am doing, I never say I am praying.  I never admit it to anyone.  It is too awkward.  But there, at the masjid, I was praying to God in front of a score of other Muslims, and I felt perfectly fine.  Better than fine! I felt secure and safe.  It was the most liberating thing since I accepted God into my heart that cold New Year’s Eve almost two years ago. 

To be continued…

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“You don’t look happy, why? You just had a great performance in the gig!”

This was a question Lon had been asking himself for a long time but he wasn’t able to come up with a reason for his unhappiness. Whatever he wanted was there in a minute or so but still, this was not what he had in mind. He knew that most people would kill for such popularity and this way of life but he was also aware that something is missing. Something that no one could say what it was. The missing thing was the answer to his restless nights, it was the answer to his unanswerable questions, and it was the peace he couldn’t get, no matter how much money he spent. The worst part was the fact that he did not know what it was and how he could find it.

“This city looks gorgeous!” he thought, during one of his visits to another country.

“What are the people doing?” he asked the driver. “They seem to be in a hurry!”

This was the moment Muslims were off to the mosques for their prayers. They wanted to get there before “congregational prayer” started.

This answer was interesting to Lon since he had never seen such a thing before. He had never seen people running to make it to a religious ceremony. He paid attention to the behaviors of the Muslims afterward. He liked them. They cared about each other and they seemed very careful about their actions. He saw himself calmer whenever he was paying attention to them. “Just looking at them makes me feel much better. Maybe this is where I have to look for the answers to my questions”

Since then, he started to search for it. The more he read, the more he got interested. It was interesting that this religion had followers in a wide variety of countries with people of very different ethnic backgrounds.

He made his decision. This was what he was looking for. This was what could answer all of his questions. This was an answer to the question which neither popularity nor wealth could bring. He left the job he was doing for 17 years. He felt calm afterward. It was like his soul found a way that could guide it when it was in the middle of nowhere. This was an end to all his confusing feelings.

Before becoming rich and famous, he always thought that these two can answer all his questions and can bring him everything he wants but later he was proved to be wrong. He understood that PEACE is what he wants and this is not what wealth and popularity are going to offer. It was ISLAM that could bring him what he was actually seeking.