Imam Sadiq (AS) is the sixth Shiite Imam after his father Imam Baqir (AS). The Shiite school is mostly famous as “Jafari School” because Imam Sadiq (AS) played the most important role among the other Imams in explaining and spreading the Shiite teachings. Most of the Shiite hadiths are narrated from Imam Sadiq (AS). 

Enlightening people about the essential message of Islam

Some Islamic teachings and practices are considered as the outer aspect of Islam, like praying, Hajj, Zakkat and stuff like that. These are the practices which any Muslim should do and respect but all of them have a deeper meaning and a concealed message that people mostly do not get. Sometimes people get so much used to do these practices and conduct ceremonies that they forget about the original meaning of them. 
The holy Prophet (PBUH & HP) says: 
O Aba-Zar! (One of the companions of the Prophet) Allah almighty doesn’t care about your faces or your wealth, but he cares about your hearts and your actions (1)
When you pray or pay your Zakkat, it must change you and teach you that praying is for getting closer to Allah and Zakkat is for helping the needy. 
In this regard the holy Quran says:
Did you see him who denies the Religion?  That is the one, who drives away the orphan, and does not urge the feeding of the needy.  Woe to those who pray but are heedless of their prayers —who show off but deny aid. (The Holy Quran 107:1-7)
Imam Sadiq (AS) in different prayers says that if you pray but still feel pride and vanity, it will be useless for you because the Satan himself prayed for Allah for 6000 years but due to his vanity and jealousy, he couldn’t stand the greatness of Adam and tried to deceive him and Allah cursed the Satan. 

Being Kind with the ones who disagree 

Once Mufazzal ibn Umar (One of the brilliant pupils of the Imam) was sitting in the Mosque of the Prophet (PBUH & HP) in Medina. Then he saw Ibn Abi al-Ouja (one of the Atheist Philosophers) who was insulting the Prophet in the mosque and telling lies to the people saying that there is no god. 
Mufazzal says that this made him so angry and he couldn’t control himself so he shouted: “O enemy of Allah! Have you become atheist and denied the God who created you?”
Ibn Abi al-Ouja replied: “If you are one of the religious scholars, I will have debate with you and if you are not, our discussion will be in vain. But if you are one of the companions of Jafar ibn Muhammad (Imam Sadiq) you must know that he wouldn’t talk to us like that and he wouldn’t have discussion with us in this way. He has heard so many more disgraceful words from us but he never has insulted us. He is so knowledgeable, patient and wise and he wouldn’t lose his control out of anger, ignorance or animosity. He always listens to us.” (2)
Imam Sadiq (AS) is famous for his numerous debates with the Sunnis, Atheists, Jews, Christians and so forth, but he would never insult them. He always would order his followers to be kind with the people. 
For example about the Sunnis Imam Sadiq (AS) says:
Participate in their funerals and visit them when they are sick, and give them their rights because if a person among you is pious, honest, trustable and good-tempered, people would say “this is a follower of Jafar” and this makes me happy! (3)

Imam Sadiq (AS) and Caring about the young people

Once Imam Sadiq (AS) asked one of his pupils who had gone to Basrah (a city in Iraq):
“How was the enthusiasm of the people for our message and converting to Shia?” Imam Sadiq (AS) asked.
He said: “The ones who want to listen to our message are so few. Some of them did but they are few”
Imam Sadiq (AS) said: “You must talk to the young ones, because they are more eager for finding everything good.” (4)
Imam Sadiq (AS) also says:
“Teach hadiths to your young children from their childhood before the time that others beat you in training them” (5)
Young Shias must set Imam Sadiq (AS) as a pattern for themselves and follow him. They should learn more and more so that the different people who have gone astray can’t deceive them. 

Resources 

1.  Al-Amali, Sheikh Toosi, Pg.536
2.  Tohid al-Mufazzal
3.  Kafi, Koleini, vol.2, pg.636
4.  Vasail ash-Shia, vol.11, pg.448
5.  Kafi, Koleini, vol.6, pg.47

“When I was younger, I always wondered how I could distinguish between love and lust. My father used to say “all these little or great worldly loves we go through, are all here for us humans to eventually experience The love, one drop at a time, and to increase our capacity for it. That’s why when we look back at our previous experiences of feeling in love, we laugh at our naivety for calling that love! And that the love we are feeling now IS the real thing. Ignorant of the fact that a little down the line, we will again be laughing at what we are calling love now.”So let us find out why has God made love? What kind of love, are we expected to feel? My father says “Love is a sign from God. Love is a miracle, and miracles are here to make us believe” [1].

I started my article on dating and falling in love using the introduction of a love story book. As any reader knows, love or dating and falling in Love is not something that can be accepted in some lands and be ignored in some others. Dating and Falling in Love know no borders. Every human being from the time he/she sets foot in this world would experience dating and falling in love in one way or other, with different things, people, pets! Lands, etc. It is actually the liveliness of love that keeps human beings move forward. This dating and falling in love could be for money, status, education, or opposite sex.

In this article, I would like to talk about Love for opposite sex and its rulings according to Islam and dating in Islam.

Do Muslims fall in love?

Love is an essential need for the human. Without love life is dark and colorless. Muslims, like any other human beings, fall in love and may spend days and nights weeping for their beloved, until they can unite with their loved ones.

However, the main point of being committed to any religion and obeying its rules is for human beings to gain control over themselves. Human beings in facing different issues of life should show this self-control, and love is one of these issues.

From what I have seen among most non-Muslim cultures and religions when they fall in love, they start dating. They meet each other at different places and make memories together. Then they can grow their love and go through sexual relationships. They would even feel so much in love that they decide to live together as lover partners. In some cases, this loving partnership may end up with a baby. And in very optimistic ways, one day their grown-up children will happily shout in a church that “I knew that mom and dad would finally get married!”. As I said, that is the optimistic side of it. Otherwise, at the end of some of these relationships, we have depressed single parents with unwanted children.

Rules of Islam for Those Falling in Love and Dating in Islam

Since dating and falling in love takes one’s mind away, when a Muslim falls in love, by considering Islamic advice she/ he can avoid its negative consequences.

According to Islam, when someone feels fallen in love! with someone, he/ she should consider that person as his/ her “spouse to be.” So, the lover can determine if he/ she can live with his/ her loved one for the rest of his/ her life, and would they make a happy family and reach their goals? If the answer is positive, then they should start to get to know each other better. In most Islamic cultures, the starting point happens through families and dating in Islam is not very common. The boy proposes to the girl in a proposal ceremony. If the girl and the families are OK at this step, then the “bride to be” and “the groom to be” can start to know each other better.

Do the “bride to be” and “the groom to be” Date? Is Dating in Islam Allowed?

Since dating in non-Muslim cultures may be followed by different kinds of sexual lust, such as touching, hugging, kissing, etc., Islam would call this sort of dating forbidden (Haram).

But this does not mean that the “groom to be” and the “bride to be” are not allowed to meet up and talk together for better recognition of each other. In Muslim families, they usually meet up at the girl’s house, where her parents are also around. Yet, some boys and girls may find it useful to go out together for a meal or talk in social places. That is for them to know each other better in different situations.

According to Islam, it is not forbidden (Haram) for a man and a woman to be together in a place where other people can come and go, and there is no fear of committing a sin. So, dating is Islam is not forbidden provided that the above conditions are observed. However, both parties should make sure to limit these meetups to a few sessions. At the end of these few sessions, they can usually decide if they want to marry or not.

And if they don’t want to marry, they should stop their meetings. Also, if they decide to get married, they should proceed to the next levels. This can be a temporary marriage for engagement period and then a permanent Islamic marriage contract. The engagement may take a few days or a few years. But they are known as a married couple during this time, and there is no prohibition for them to be together. “After the recitation of the marriage formula, the couple may enjoy each other unless a certain enjoyment is agreed to be delayed to the night of consummating the marriage, in which case he has to observe the specified term.” [2]

Possible Damages of Dating

When two people start dating without a serious intention of marrying their partner, they start wasting their time on a useless relationship, solely for fun and enjoyment. Most of the time one of the parties is aware that he/ she does not see a future for this relationship. The other one keeps hoping for a marriage proposal. When it never happens, disappointment would fill his/ her life.

Also, people who keep dating with no intention for marriage would enjoy a relationship in which, unlike marriage, they are irresponsible towards their partner.

When other youths see how easy some people have fun with the opposite sex, they would be encouraged to date, too.

Usually, after many years of dating, when both parties have lost their younghood eagerness, they would shape a family. Although it is still very good to start family life, their life is much different from those who marry and have children at a younger age.

Conclusion

To conclude, dating in Islam for the sake of having fun with opposite sex and without a legal Islamic marriage contract is forbidden (Haram). But meeting up for further recognition is allowed (Halal). The main reason that makes dating in Islam prohibited is to protect both parties of possible damages of an unstable relationship. Thus, pre-marriage meetings (unlike dating) should be free of any kind of sexual lust, and only for the sake of finding a suitable spouse.

So, it is not forbidden (Haram) to fall in love according to Islam. But managing this love and controlling the self is of high importance. This would prevent people from committing great sins like adultery.

Reference:

1. Bahmanpour, Sedigheh, God Is Here, p. 1
2. love in Islam