We live in a diverse world with people of varying backgrounds and differences. People have different looks and colors, different cultures and traditions, thoughts and viewpoints, religions and beliefs, etc. However, they all live together on planet Earth where they need to have social connections, relationships and more importantly a sense of togetherness. In fact, the need for belonging to a society or community is the main reason why people seek friends.

However, finding a good friend and building a healthy and strong relationship is not always an easy task. Many factors influence the choice of friends with religion and beliefs being particularly important to people. It becomes even more significant when it comes to Islam, as we have a few verses in the Quran about friendship. These verses have raised the question of whether Muslims can be friends with non-Muslims.

In this text we will go through the verses of the Quran and some narrations to find the answer to the question mentioned above.

What does the Quran say about friendship?

The fact that the Quran emphasizes the issue of friendship in different verses and from different aspects shows the importance of friendship and how friends can influence each other’s lives and destinies. 

There is a verse in the Quran that talks about the regrets of people who end up in hell saying: 
“Woe to me! I wish I had not taken so and so as a friend! Certainly, he led me astray from the Reminder after it had come to me, and Satan is a deserter of man.’” (25: 28-29)

When the Quran talks about the huge shock that disbelievers go through in the hereafter it says:
 “Now we have no intercessors, nor do we have any sympathetic friend.” (26: 110- 101)   

Theses verses show that having a friend is a real need for human beings, even in the next life, and emphasize the fact that friends can either be misleading or genuine. Since the influence of friends is so important on human beings, Allah (SWT) advises us on the characteristics of good and bad friends and guides us on who to befriend and who to avoid. 

Who to befriend and who to avoid?

There are some verses in the Quran in which Allah (SWT) guides us not to take specific people as friends:

1-    Close friends should be of yourselves

“O you who have faith! Do not take your confidants from others than yourselves; they will spare nothing to ruin you. They are eager to see you in distress. Hatred has already shown itself from their mouths, and what their breasts hide [within] is yet worse. We have certainly made the signs clear for you, should you exercise your reason.” (3:118) 

Confidants are close friends with whom we share secrets. In the above verse Allah (SWT) advises us not to take our close friends from among those who are not faithful to us, whether they are Muslims or non-Muslims, since these types of people will try their best to endanger and harm us in any possible way. [1] 

However, the verse emphasizes close friends with whom we share secrets, and does not forbid normal friendship with people to whom we don’t share secrets and have routine conversations in which we can teach them and learn from them. 

2-    Being friends with just polytheists is not forbidden 

“Allah does not forbid you from dealing with kindness and justice with those [polytheists] who did not make war against you on account of religion and did not expel you from your homes. Indeed, Allah loves the just. Allah forbids you only in regard to those who made war against you on account of religion and expelled you from your homes and supported [the polytheists of Makkah] in your expulsion, that you make friends with them, and whoever makes friends with them—it is they who are the wrongdoers.” (60: 7- 8)

Therefore, living a peaceful life alongside those non-Muslims who respect you and your beliefs is not forbidden; rather, it is recommended to have communication with these type of moral and just non-Muslims so that you may convey the words of Allah (SWT) to them in words or by your actions. 
“If any of the polytheists seeks asylum from you, grant him asylum until he hears the Word of Allah. Then convey him to his place of safety. That is because they are a people who do not know.” (9:6)
But let’s study the verses of the Quran that seem to be in contradiction with what we just said, where Allah (SWT) commands us not to befriend a group of people.

3-    Do not befriend enemies of Allah  

“O you who have faith! Do not take My enemy and your enemy for friends, [secretly] offering them affection, if you have set out for jihad in My way and to seek My pleasure, for they have certainly denied whatever has come to you of the truth, expelling the Apostle and you, because you have faith in Allah, your Lord. You secretly nourish affection for them, while I know well whatever you hide and whatever you disclose, and whoever among you does that has certainly strayed from the right way.” (60: 1)

The phrase “my enemy and your enemy” in the above verse shows that the enemies of Allah (SWT) are, in fact, the enemies of believers, too. The logical reason for which Allah (SWT) forbids us from befriending His enemies is that they are not well-wishers for Muslims and try their best to ridicule, humiliate, and weaken the believers. What they wish for the believers is explained in different verses of the Quran: 

“Neither the faithless from among the People of the Book nor the idolaters like that any good be showered on you from your Lord” (2: 105), “They are eager to see you in distress” (3: 118), “The faithless are eager that you should be oblivious to your weapons and your baggage, so that they could assault you all at once” (4: 102), “Indeed they are devising a stratagem” (86: 15).

These verses explain the reasons why Allah (SWT) prohibits us from befriending His enemies and because they try their best to harm us, and the reason for that as explained in the Quran is: 
“Satan has prevailed upon them, so he has caused them to forget the remembrance of Allah. They are Satan’s confederates. Look! Indeed, it is Satan’s confederates who are the losers!” (58: 19)

These verses that advise Muslims to avoid befriending non-Muslims or idolaters are mostly about political relationships between countries where these friendships may endanger the interests of Muslim countries. And if a Muslim befriends non-Muslims or idolater who do not care about the interests of his/her country, they need to be cautious not to share secrets with them and keep their friendship in a level where they are not influenced by those friends. Rather they can affect them positively, because: 

“Allah will never provide the faithless any way [to prevail] over the faithful.” (4: 141)

References: 

1. Qara’ati, M. Tafseer-e Nour, vol. 1, p. 591

Hadith 21: The Condition of Honor

Imam Sadiq (as) said: Whoever wants to be in the neighborhood of the Prophet (pbuh&HP) and next to Ali (AS) and Fatima (AS) should not leave the pilgrimage of Imam Hussain (AS).  
Wasa'il al-Shi'ah, vol. 10, p. 331, p. 39

Hadith 22: Pilgrimage, Divine Duty

Imam Sadiq (as) said: If one of you observes the Ihram of Hajj for the entire of his life but does not visit Imam Hussain (as), he has left the right of the Messenger of Allah (PBUH&HP) because the right of Hussain (as) is a divine duty and obligatory for every Muslim.
 Wasa'il al-Shi'ah, vol. 10, p. 333

Hadith 23: Karbala, the Kaaba of Perfection

Imam Sadiq (as) said: Whoever does not visit the grave of Imam Hussain (as) until he dies, his faith will be incomplete and his religion will be incomplete, and when he goes to heaven, he will be lower than the believers there. 
Wasa'il al-Shi'ah, vol. 10, p. .335

Hadith 24: From Pilgrimage to Martyrdom

Imam Sadiq (as) said: Do not leave the pilgrimage of Imam Hussain (as) and recommend it to your friends and companions as well! May Allah prolong your life, increase your sustenance, and may Allah bless you alive and you will not die except as a martyr. 
Wasa'il al-Shi'ah  vol. 10, p. 335

Hadith 25: The Hadith of Love

It was narrated from Imam Sadiq (as) that he said: Whoever Allah wants good, will put the love of Hussain (AS) and his pilgrimage in his heart, and whoever Allah wants bad, will have him hate Hussain (AS) and anxious with his pilgrimage.
 Wasa'il al-Shi'ah  vol. 10, p. 388, Sea of Lights, vol. 98, p. 76

Hadith 26: A Sign of Being a Shiite

Imam Sadiq (as) said: Whoever does not visit the grave of Imam Hussain and dies as our Shiite and dies, is not our Shiite, and even if he is from the people of Paradise, he is the guest of the people of Paradise.
Kamel Al-Ziyarat, p. 193, Bihar Al-Anwar, vol. 98, p.4

Hadith 27: Ascension Platform

Imam Sadiq (as) said: Whoever visits the grave of Hussain (as) and has knowledge of the right of that Imam, Allah Almighty will register him in the highest rank.
Man la yahzurul Faqih, vol. 2, p.581

Hadith 28: The School of Knowledge

Imam Musa Kadhim (as) said: The least reward that is given to the pilgrim of Imam Hussain (as) on the banks of the Euphrates is that all his sins, before and after, are forgiven. Provided that he knows the right, honor and guardianship of that Imam.
Mustadrak al-Wasa'il, vol. 10, p. 236, quoting Kamil al-Ziyarat, p. 138

Hadith 29: Like the Pilgrimage of Allah

Imam Reza (as) said: Whoever visits the grave of Imam Hussain (as) on the banks of the Euphrates is like the one who has visited Allah. 
Mustadrak al-Wasa'il, vol. 10, p. 250, quoting in full

Chapter Three: Ashura and Arbaeen

Hadith 30: Pilgrimage at Ashura

Imam Sadiq (as) said: Whoever visits Imam Hussain (as) on the day of Ashura, heaven will be obligatory for him. 
Iqbal al-A'mal, p. 568

Hadith 31: Above Prosperity

Imam Sadiq (as) said: Whoever wakes up on the night of Ashura next to the shrine of Imam Hussain (as), on the Day of Judgment he will rush to Allah stained in his blood, like someone who was killed in Karbala next to Imam Hussain (as). 
Wasaelu shiah, vol. 10, p.372

Hadith 32: Signs of Faith

Imam Hassan Askari (as) said: The signs of a believer are five: 

1 Fifty prayers 

2 Arbaeen pilgrimage

3 Ring in the right hand 

4 Prostrating on the ground 

5 Saying loudly the name of Allah, (Bismillah Rahman Rahim)

 Wasaelu shia, vol. 10, p. 373, and also Al-Tahdhib, vol. 6, p. 52

Chapter Four: Torbat and Tasbih of Love

Hadith 33: His Porch 

The Prophet of Islam (PBUH&HP) said: Know that the answer to prayer is under the dome of his shrine and healing is in his soil, and the Imams (as) are of his children.
 Mustadrak al-Wasa'il, vol. 10, p.335

Hadith 34: Soil and Training

Imam Sadiq (as) said: Take your children with the soil of Hussain (as) (Karbala) because the soil of Karbala insures your children. 
Wasaelu Shiah, vol. 10, p.410

Hadith 35: The Greatest Medicine

Imam Sadiq (as) said: The cure for any pain is in the soil (torbat) of Hussain (as) and it is the greatest medicine. Kamil Al-Ziyarat, p. 275 and Wasa'il al-Shi'ah, vol. 10, p. 410

Hadith 36: Torbat (soil of Karbala) and seven hijabs

Imam Sadiq (as) said: Prostration on the soil of Hussain (as) tears the seven veils. 
Mesbah al-Muttahid, p. 511, and Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 98, p. 135

Hadith 37: Prostration on the Soil of Love

Imam Sadiq (as) did not prostrate on the ground except on the soil of Hussain (as) and he did this in violence for the sake of Allah.
Wasailu shiah vol. 3, p.608

Hadith 38: Rosary with the Soil of Karbala

Imam Sadiq (as) said: Prostration on the soil of Karbala can light up to the seventh earth, and whoever has a rosary from the soil of the shrine of Hussain (as) with him, is a truthful person, even if he says nothing.
Man la yahzurulFaqih vol 1 p 268 

Hadith 39: Healing Soil

Imam Kadhim (as) while narrating a hadith announcing his death, said: do not take anything from the soil of my grave to seek blessings, because it is forbidden for us to eat any soil except the soil of my grandfather Hussain (as), Allah Almighty has healed only the soil of Karbala for the Shiites and our friends. 
Jami ahadith, vol. 12, p.533

Hadith 40: One of the Four Needs

Imam Musa ibn Ja'far (as) said: Our needs are four things:

1. Prayer mat on which prayers are offered.

2. Rings on the finger

3. Toothbrush with which to brush teeth

4. A rosary from the shrine of Imam Hussain (as) Tahdhib al-Ahkam, vol. 6, p. 75