When a child is born, he sees only two people by his side who are with him at all stages of life, are willing to help him until death takes them apart, want his success in everything, and are open to any harm for the sake of his success. They give him the basic teachings of life and try to prepare him in the best way to enter society. Their names are the first words a baby utters: mom and dad. In this topic, we are going to talk about the place has given to the father in Islam.

Father’s Status as High as a Step Below Allah

When we talk about an issue from an Islamic perspective, the best document we can come up with is the Holy Quran. Before going to the topic of parents’ status in Islam, we should mention that Allah also commanded the followers of previous divine religions to respect their parents and that this commandment of Allah was along with several other commandments, including monotheism; Because loving and caring about parents is a natural human trait and is restricted neither to time nor people or religion. We now turn to a number of Quranic guidelines on the status of parents in Islam:

"…Do not worship except Allah, and to parents do good…" (The Holy Quran 2:83)

"Worship Allah and associate nothing with Him, and to parents do good …" (The Holy Quran 4:36)

"Be grateful to Me and to your parents; to Me is the [final] destination" (The Holy Quran 31:14)

When you think carefully about these verses, you can see an epic image; Allah places parents in the Muslim’s life right after His high position and goodness to parents beside monotheism. Now that we know about Quran’s perspective, let us read more about this matter in the Islamic narrations. Another important matter before reading the narrations, however, is that Allah never singles out a parent but mentions both of them meaning that the mother’s placement is as high as the father’s in Islam.

Islamic Narrations Perspective Father in Islam

-Undoubtedly, the dignity of the father is unique before Allah; To the extent that Prophet Mohammad (PBUH&HP) said: The father is in the middle of paradise, it is up to you to either keep it or waste it. (1) This means that achieving divine grace depends on the consent of the father. His position and respect are highly recommended in such a way that it cannot be easily overlooked, as far as the Islamic lifestyle is concerned. Of course, in today's world, parents are not valued as they should be, but in the school of Islam and in various verses that we read above, their placement is high. This position is so great that the Prophet (PBUH&HP) has introduced himself and Imam Ali (PBUH) to the people as the fathers of this nation (2) which means that everything the two do is only for the success and progress of this blessed religion, and they wish nothing in return; just like a father sacrifices his life for the betterment of his children.

-If a parent curses his child, he will not have a way to heaven. Not only will he not have a way, but he will be deprived of the smell of heaven from afar. As the Holy Prophet of Islam (PBUH&HP) said: The smell will reach the nostrils, but not the nostrils of such parents. (3)

- In this regard, Imam Reza (as) also says: "It is obligatory to do good to one's parents, even though they are polytheists, but in disobeying God, one should not be commanded by them." (4)

- A man named Ibrahim, one of the companions of Imam Sadigh (AS), said to him: “My father is very old and incapacitated so that when he wants to do the basics of his life, we take him on our shoulders and take him away”. Imam said: "If you can do such a thing yourself and make food for him with your own hands; because such a service is the shield of fire for the day after your resurrection". (5)

- One of the moral precepts of Islam is to keep the name and memory of parents alive. In a part of the prayer of Imam Sajjad (as) it is stated: “O my God! "I do not remember my parents at the end of the prayers, and I do not remember them at all moments of the evening and at all hours of the day." (6) 

This was the indication on remembrance, in any form and in any way, of doing good to fathers and a kind of appreciation for their efforts and promoting the tradition of respect for elders. Also, Hafez, one of the famous Persian poets said on this topic: How to nurture the sweetness of your heart // When you do not remember your father, you stone-hearted. (7)

Conclusion

As we look at Islam and its Prophet through narrations, we see that the value and importance they place on human parents is very high and only a step lower than Allah, a place that if people seek redemption and heaven, they are given based on their goodness to parents. We hope that in this way we can be benevolent children for our parents and models for other Muslims.

References:

1. Gharar al-Hikam (21th volume – page 174)
2. Bihar al-Anwar (16th volume – page 95)
3. Tafsir Nemooneh (12th volume – page 97)
4. Bihar al-Anwar (16th volume – page 100)
5. Bihar al-Anwar (16th volume – page 101)
6. Al-Sahifa Al-Sajjadiyya (24th Supplication)
7. The Divan of Hafez – 298th sonnet 

Silatur-Rahim or preserving family ties is not limited to visiting relatives, but also includes trying to satisfy their needs and strengthening emotional bonds with them. This depends of course on the situation of each member of the family; one might require money while the other has emotional needs [1].

Some of the examples of Silatur-Rahim are: visiting relatives; greeting and honoring them; inviting them even to a cup of coffee or tea; giving them good advice in case of a problem; not harming them by talking behind their back, insulting or accusing them, or by interfering in their personal affairs; being kind and caring about them; visiting them when they are sick; giving them gifts in different occasions; fulfilling their needs before others do, and participating in their funerals [1]. Imam Sadiq has(AS) said: “… The best family tie is the one in which the relatives are not harmed” [2].

Maintaining family ties: Benefits

Upholding kinship with relatives has various advantages in this world and the hereafter:
Having the social and emotional support of family: In Surah Hud, where people threaten Prophet Shu’ayb (PBUH), they tell him if his tribe had not supported him, they would have stoned him (11:91).

Imam Ali (AS) said: “Upholding family ties brings affection and humiliates enemies” [3].

Having an immediate reward: Imam Baqir (AS) said: “The reward of Silatur Rahim is given more quickly than any good deed” [4].

Increase in wealth: Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) said: “Whoever keeps family kinship, God will love him and increase his wealth” [5].

Having some of the sins vanished: Imam Ali (AS) said: “Eliminate your sins by a voluntary charity and keeping family ties” [6].

Having an easy death and a long life: When Prophet Moses (PBUH) asked God about the reward of upholding family ties, the answer was: “(Whoever does so,) I will postpone his death, I will make his death easy, and the heaven angles will call him to enter heaven from every door he wishes” [7].

Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) said: “Whoever keeps family kinship …God will make his life longer and let him enter heaven” [6]. Imam Baqir (AS) said: “Keeping family ties purifies one’s deeds, increases his wealth, keeps him safe from disasters, makes the accounting of his deeds easy and postpones his death” [8]. Imam Sadiq (AS) said; “Silatur Rahim makes lives longer …, even if doers are not righteous” [9].

Severing Family Ties: Consequences

One cannot sever family kinship deliberately since upholding family bonds is a duty ordered by God, hence, the disobedience from this order is of the major sins (al-Kaba’ir) [10].

In Islam, the warnings against severing and breaking off family bonds are as many as the exhortations to uphold family ties. That is due to the disastrous consequences that neglecting and severing family ties can have on one’s life; these include:

Having a shorter life than it would be: Imam Sadiq (AS) said: “a man might have 33 years of his life left, but God will shorten it to 3 years if he breaks family ties” [11]. In another narration from Imam (AS), negligence of family bonds is known as “a sin that perishes a man quickly” [12].

quickly receiving a punishment, Imam Baqir (AS) said: “four sins cause quick punishments … (one is) breaking family ties” [13].

Being cursed by God [i] and deprived of his mercy: “But as for those who ... sever what Allah has commanded to be joined, … it is such on whom the curse will lie, and for them will be the ills of the [ultimate] abode” (13:25).

Being doomed to the hell: Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) has said: “the sweet smell of heaven will be sensed from a thousand year of distance but those who have been insolent to the parents and those who have broken family ties will be deprived of it” [14].

One’s prayers (Dua) will not be accepted anymore after severing family ties [15].

One’s good deeds will be rejected: Imam Rida (AS) said: “whoever sever family ties, he does not fear from God (does not have Taqwa), his good deeds are therefore refused and will face grave punishments in this world and the hereafter” [16].

Severing Family Kinship: Causes

Cutting family ties has several reasons, but lack of modesty and greed are known as the two main ones. Imam Sadiq (AS) said that: “Some would not have respected parents’ rights and kept family ties if modesty had not existed” [17].

Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) has warned about greed: “Beware of greed, for it was greed that commanded those before you to bloodshed and severing their family ties” [18].

Notes:

[i]  (2:27), (13:25), (47:22-23).

References:

1. A. Javadi Amoli, “Mafatih al-hayat”, p. 217.
2. Shaykh al-Kulayni, “Al-Kafi”, vol. 2, p. 151.
3. Imam Ali (AS), “Ghurar al-Hikam wa Durar al-Kalim”, vol. 4, p. 209, T. 5825.
4. Shaykh al-Kulayni, “Al-Kafi”, vol. 2, p. 152.
5. Shaykh al-Saduq, “Uyun akhbar al-Rida(AS)”, vol. 2, p. 37.
6. Imam Ali (AS), “Ghurar al-Hikam wa Durar al-Kalim”, vol. 4, p. 635, T. 7258.
7. Fattal Neyshaburi, “Rawdat al-wa'izin wa basirat al-mutta'izin”, vol. 2, p. 370.
8. Ibn Shu’bah, “Tuhaf al-Uqul”, p. 299.
9. Shaykh Tusi, “Al-Amali”, p. 481.
10. R. Khomeini, “Tahrir al-Wasilah”, vol. 1, p. 274.
11. Shaykh al-Kulayni, “Al-Kafi”, vol. 2, p. 153.
12. Shaykh al-Saduq, “Illal Al Sharaie”, p. 584.
13. Ibn Babawayh, “Al-Khisal”, p. 230.
14. Shaykh al-Kulayni, “Al-Kafi”, vol. 2, p. 349.
15. H. T. Nuri Ṭabarsi, “Mustadrak al-Wasail”, vol. 15, p. 185.
16.  A. Javadi Amoli, “Mafatih al-hayat”, p. 215.
17. “Tawḥid al-Mofazzal”, p. 79.
18. Ibn Babawayh, “Al-Khisal”, p. 176.